Merry Christmas!

God has brought us through another year. The last few years have been a huge challenge to our family, but it has made us stronger and our walk with the Lord has been deepened. We are so grateful for how well Tim is feeling now --the doctors are just going to monitor him monthly to stay on top on anything that might develop or change.

The kids are doing well and keep us very busy. Matthew (17) has entered the Job Corps program in Massachusetts. He will be home for a 3 week vacation and then return to the program in January. He is studying the security/military track and seems to be adjusting well. Michael (13) is growing faster than we can keep up with! He will be starting a new therapy in January - he was recently diagnosed with Autism. We are very excited about this program and look forward to seeing him progress in the coming months. Mark (6) and McKayla (7) are two peas in a pod! They love school and are looking forward to being in both the school and church Christmas programs this year.

May you and your family have a wonderful Christmas celebrating the birth of our Savior. Thank you for your love, support and prayers for our family.

-Tim and Stacie

Test Results

One of my doctors called today with the test results that I have been waiting for. I struggle with any explanation because it is very complex and I do not fully understand it myself. Both of my doctors hesistate in saying that I am definitively in remission anymore, but the tests seem to show that my cancer is at least being held at bay. Overall my doctors are cautiously optimistic. I will take that as good news for now. They will continue to monitor me monthly. I feel good and God is in control. My cancer could become active at any time, so continue to keep me in prayer.


We hope that you and your family have a wonderful Thanksgiving.

-Tim

MRI Results

We received the results from the MRI and they are complicated, but I will try to simplify them as best I can.

First of all, Tim has a herniated disc which is a result of his spinal column being weakened by the cancer. The doctor believes that this is probably the source of his pain and he needs to rest in order for that to heal.

Second, there is new place on one of the vertebrae that is of "uncertain significance." Tim's most recent blood work also showed protein levels that were slightly elevated and so the doctor has ordered a bone marrow test for the middle of November. This test will be more definitive in showing exactly whether the multiple myeloma is trying to become active.

The MRI also showed that many of the lesions that were on his spinal column before the stem cell treatment are "no longer identified," which shows that there has been healing in those areas.

So, we are encouraged and cautious at the same time. We are praying for peace of mind as we wait for the next tests to be completed. Thank you for keeping us in your prayers.

Opportunity to Pray...

About 3 weeks ago, Tim started having some back pain and after an exam at the oncologist's office last week, the doctor was concerned enough to schedule an MRI. Tim had the MRI today and we are waiting for the results. We do not have any idea what the source of the pain is, however it is in the area of one of the tumors on his spine. We are praying for peace of mind until we hear the results. As soon as we know something, I will post again.

Thou wilt keep him in perfect peace whose mind is stayed on Thee: because he trusteth in Thee. Isaiah 26:3

One year later...

September 11th is significant to us for more that one reason: first of all it is the day that we remember and honor those who died or were injured in the attacks on our country and its freedom. I'm sure we all can remember exactly where we were when we first heard about what was unfolding in New York City and Washington D. C. and how distressed we were see our country being attacked in such a horrific manner.

Tim and I also remember exactly where we were one year ago today when we received the life-changing news that Tim had two tumors on his spinal column and they were probably cancerous. After a few more tests in the following weeks, it was confirmed to be just that - Tim had Multiple Myeloma, a cancer of the blood plasma. Since then, cancer has become an unwelcome visitor to our home and family. Our routine and life style changed as we began the doctor visits, medication routines, diet changes and more. Even things like lifting a box or bending over to pick up something became an effort for Tim. Our perspective on everything changed, as we now had this invader living with us and affecting our lives in a very significant way.

It has been an overwhelming year of emotions and physical and spiritual challenges, but through it all God has been faithful to carry us and sustain us. We know that nothing can enter our lives without first being approved by our Heavenly Father. He knows what is best for us and what will cause us to grow and become more like Him. We are learning to take the hurts in our lives and make them opportunities - opportunities to strengthen our walk with the Lord, to pray more, to empathize with others on a deeper level and to hopefully show His grace through it all.

We are thankful that Tim is in remission and he is feeling great! We are thankful for the many prayer warriors who continue to carry Tim's name to the Throne of Grace. We keep hearing of more and more people that we do not know but who have prayed for Tim. It is very humbling---we are so grateful.

So on September 11th, we will take time to look back and remember the events of that day nine years ago. We are so very grateful to be Americans and pray that God will continue to bless our country. Tim and I will also take time today to look back and remember all that God has done for us in this past year and thank Him for His goodness to us.

Psalm 18:2 The LORD is my rock, and my fortress, and my deliverer; my God, my strength, in whom I will trust; my buckler, and the horn of my salvation, and my high tower.

August Update

It's hard to believe that August is almost over. School has started and we are getting back into our fall routine. August was a very eventful month for us. Michael turned 13, McKayla turned 7 and Tim and I celebrated our 20th wedding anniversary.

As we reflect on 20 years, we are humbled by God's goodness to us. We have been through a lot in 20 years, but He has been faithful to carry us and sustain us. (One day we are going to write a book about all of our experiences!) We have received so many blessings, we can't begin to count them! We serve a very gracious God!

Our new associate pastor and his family also arrived in Branford this month. Our church family worked hard in the weeks prior to their arrival to clean, paint and prepare their new home and then helped them get moved in. Pastor Matt Fitch and his wife, Julie, have jumped head first into the ministry here. It seems like they have been here for years! It is truly a blessing to have them here to help carry the load.

One of the biggest answers to prayer by far is how well Tim is doing after the treatment this summer. This past week, he met with the doctor that did the stem cell transplant and he was very encouraged by how well Tim's blood work looked; and how quickly he has recovered from such a rough treatment. We know that it was because of the prayers of so many all over the country. We appreciate your prayers that he will continue to feel as well as he does now, and that the cancer will stay in remission.

An update on the hair growth: Tim's hair is starting to grow back. He's in the "fuzzy" stage. A sweet lady at church today told him, "You know, Pastor, it has to get worse before it gets better!" Need I say anymore??? ☺

The kids received free tickets to Six Flags from school this year and we weren't sure that we would be able to go. Two days before they expired, Tim felt good enough to go, so off we went! We had beautiful weather and a fun family day. I just had to include this picture of Tim with Mr. Six...the resemblence is uncanny!!!

Success!

We are rejoicing in the good news we received this week. God has been gracious - the stem cell transplant was successful and Tim's cancer is in remission! Praise the Lord! The prayers of so many have been answered. He is feeling on top of the world right now and back to a full work schedule. The doctors will continue to monitor him over the next several months, but it was a huge blessing to hear that he is in remission. Now, our prayer is that the cancer stays in remission and he continues to feel as well as he does right now.

We are busy preparing for the arrival of our new assistant pastor and his family - it is so good to say "our assistant pastor." We are excited and honored to have Matt and Julie Fitch joining us at Community Baptist Church to help take our church to the next level. We have so many plans and are grateful that they are willing to partner with us to reach our community with the Gospel and help strengthen and support our CBC family. We are looking forward to exciting days ahead.

I hope you run through the rain!

My dad sent me this story. I don't know if it is true, but it is certainly poignant.

A little girl had been shopping with her Mom in Target. She must have been 6 years old, this beautiful red haired, freckle faced image of innocence.

It was pouring outside. The kind of rain that gushes over the top of rain gutters, so much in a hurry to hit the earth it has no time to flow down the spout. We all stood there, under the awning, just inside the door of the Target. We waited, some patiently, others irritated because nature messed up their hurried day.

I am always mesmerized by rainfall. I got lost in the sound and sight of the heavens washing away the dirt and dust of the world. Memories of running, splashing so carefree as a child came pouring in as a welcome reprieve from the worries of my day. Her little voice was so sweet as it broke the hypnotic trance we were all caught in. "Mom let's run through the rain," she said.

"What?" Mom asked.

"Let's run through the rain!" She repeated.

"No, honey. We'll wait until it slows down a bit," Mom replied.

This young child waited a minute and repeated: "Mom, let's run through the rain!"

"We'll get soaked if we do," Mom said.

"No, we won't, Mom. That's not what you said this morning," the young girl said as she tugged at her Mom's arm.

"This morning? When did I say we could run through the rain and not get wet?"

"Don't you remember? When you were talking to Daddy about his cancer, you said, 'If God can get us through this, he can get us through anything!' "

The entire crowd stopped dead silent. I'm sure you couldn't hear anything but the rain. We all stood silently. No one left. Mom paused and thought for a moment about what she would say.

Now some would laugh it off and scold her for being silly. Some might even ignore what was said. But this was a moment of affirmation in a young child's life. A time when innocent trust can be nurtured so that it will bloom into faith.

"Honey, you are absolutely right. Let's run through the rain. If GOD let's us get wet, well maybe we just need washing!" Mom said.

Then off they ran. We all stood watching, smiling and laughing as they darted past the cars and yes, through the puddles. They got soaked.

They were followed by a few who screamed and laughed like children all the way to their cars. And yes, I did. I ran. I got wet. I needed washing.

Circumstances or people can take away your material possessions, they can take away your money, and they can take away your health. But no one can ever take away your precious memories...So, don't forget to make time and take the opportunities to make memories every day.

To everything there is a season and a time to every purpose under heaven.

I HOPE YOU STILL TAKE THE TIME TO RUN THROUGH THE RAIN.

-Author Unknown

A Busy Summer

Tim is feeling great and is so happy to be back at church and working again. He says he feels better than he has in over a year! We know that he would not have done so well throughout the treatment were it not for the prayers of 100's of people all over the country. We are humbled by the support and love we have received and grateful to have been included in your prayers.

Tim has an appointment next week to have some testing done. These tests should tell us whether the cancer has gone into remission. We are resting in the Lord as we await those results and will post as soon as we know something.

Our family is keeping me very busy this summer - Matthew is at The Wilds of New England camp this week. He has been working hard with his lawn business and earned a nice break this week at camp. Michael sliced his finger and had to have 4 stitches yesterday. He's going to be fine, but enjoying the extra attention. McKayla is running a fever again (now on day 2) and is not feeling well. She is very sad to be missing Vacation Bibe School this week. Mark is continuing to practice his negotiating skills on me. He is a little attorney and can worm his way out of pretty much anything! We call him our little Einstein since he is such a "brainiac"! ☺

Since there's not much to post about Tim, I thought I'd share some adorable pictures with you. I finally had a chance to have Mark's K-5 graduation pictures made. Isn't he cute!!!

Little graduate

Little Attorney...?

Little Preacher...?


Hurray! I'm done!

He's Back!

Tim was back at church today and preached a great message on "Great Faith" from Matthew 15. He was very excited to be there and everyone was glad to see him. People were asking me how I felt to have him come back to church so much earlier than expected. I was VERY glad to have my husband there and I am not at all surprised that he was there. You can't keep Tim down for long! God has been gracious and allowed him to recover in good time. He is almost back to 100% (minus the hair ☺) and I can't keep him still any longer! It was a good day for our family to all go to church together, and it was good for our church to have their pastor back in business.

Heat Wave

It is HOT here in Connecticut and has been all week. It is forecasted to stay that way until Sunday. Tim says that one good thing about not having any hair is that it helps keep him cool. I don't plan on going "on the shinny side" to find out about that. :) For you Southerners who are enjoying your central air conditioning during this heat wave... be thankful! Many homes and small businesses here in New England do NOT have central air - including our own home. It has been at or close to 100 for the last 3 days and it is like walking into an oven to go into one of our rooms that do not have a window unit. Fall can't come soon enough for this transplanted Southerner!

Grandma Zac was here for a week and we had a nice time with her. She is always a big help with the laundry when she is here and the kids love to play Uno and Skipbo with her and just enjoy spending time with her. We were all sad to see her go back to Pennsylvania, but since she is only 3 hours away, we hope we will see her again soon!

Tim has made a positive turn in his recovery and is doing really well. His strength and stamina are returning and he is feeling great! His taste is still not back to normal, but it is getting better. He is chomping at the bit to preach and I have a feeling it may happen this Sunday...stay tuned.

How I’m Doing...

First of all, I want to thank all of the countless people who are praying for me and sending me notes of encouragement. I really do not feel that I would be doing as well as I am without the prayers and strength I have received from God’s people.

It is coming up on a month since my treatment began. As you can see I have lost all of my hair, but unlike Samson, I am gaining strength instead of losing it. (Sorry for the comparison. I know there really is no comparison.) I continue experience weakness and fatigue during the day. I have learned to take an afternoon nap and go to bed early. This seems to help. It makes me feel like an old man sometimes, but maybe I am. Any of you senior saints out there take an afternoon nap? Please pray that my full strength will return soon.

Slowly, but surely, my taste and my appetite are returning. I have lost about 10 pounds simply because I do not want to eat much since nothing tastes just right. I eat anyway just because I need to.

So what do I do during the day? I try to find something productive every day to occupy my time and make me useful. Today, I painted a door. It took an hour or so. That’s about all I can do physically today. I have also been preparing messages, doctrinal essays, and counseling ministry guidelines. This work for the church is very satisfying for me. Also, I have read a large book, and some have given me CD’s for my listening pleasure. Besides that, I take care of the pool, pay some bills, go for walks, and yes- nap.
There is always a nap.

Rest is good, but I hope to get back to church sooner than later. With God’s help and your prayers I will. Keep holding me up.

Sermon from a Sick Pastor

The following was written by Tim and was sent to our folks at CBC. I wanted to share it with everyone. I hope it will be a blessing to all who read it. Tim is in good spirits and slowly gaining strength, but still experiencing weakness, fatigue, mild nausea and his taste is still not exactly right. All the kids are well for now...Stacie

Psalm 27:13, 14

Introduction:
The idea for a sermon like this came from when I was reading the biography of Charles Spurgeon, the famous English preacher of the late 1800’s. On more than one occasion he was out of the ministry due to illness. Whenever that was the case, he would use his mind to create printed sermons as a way to communicate with the congregation that God had entrusted Him to lead. One time he suffered from a bout with smallpox. It was during this time that he wrote “A Sermon from a Sick Preacher” and “How to Handle Adversity.” I intend to follow the same pattern as I recover from my stem cell replacement therapy and cancer treatments.

The text that I have chosen is Psalm 27:13, 14. In it David says, “I had fainted, unless I had believed to see the goodness of the LORD in the land of the living. Wait on the LORD: be of good courage, and he shall strengthen thine heart: wait, I say, on the LORD.”

In this passage we see the unbreakable relationship between faith and patience. Like Jack and Jill, the two go together in the story of the Christian experience. You cannot have one without the other. The one produces the other. Together they produce courage. Faith, patience, courage- when you are facing a trial of affliction you need a good dose of each one of these.

I. Faith
First of all you will notice in your English translation that the words, “I had fainted” are in italics which mean that they are not found in the Hebrew text but were supplied by the translators for the purpose of adding sense and meaning. In the Hebrew language verse 13 is an elliptical style phrase. In other words, the writer is deliberately obscure to force the reader to “fill in the blanks.” It could read like this, “Unless I had believed to see the goodness of God in the land of the living, where would I be?” There are many options as to how this could read. I think the translators chose an appropriate phrase because the focus of the entire psalm is that when you have faith, fear will disappear. They leave the impression that David was at the point of succumbing to fear and ready to faint except that God gave him faith to believe in the goodness of God.

Fear is a common human condition. It grows from general dread and apprehension to severe dread and terror. It starts when we are children as we are afraid of the dark. It continues during the teen years as we become afraid of rejection, humiliation, and failure. It grows in adulthood as our lives are filled will all possible problems and dilemmas.

Lately, for me fear has been my nemesis, as I was diagnosed with multiple myeloma cancer in the fall of last year. What I had believed was simply a muscle strain in my back turned out to be much more serious. I became very apprehensive about my family, my future, my church, the pain, and even how others would view my disease. My fears would sometimes keep me awake at night. But like David I am learning to develop faith in the Word of God so that my fears will disappear.

David says in verse 1, “The LORD is my light and my salvation; whom shall I fear?” He could have just as well said, “What shall I fear?” In the dark times we simply need to focus on the sovereignty of God believing that he knows the path of our life. He is our light in a dark path. He also is our salvation or deliverer. If we feel surrounded by the enemy in a dark alley we can know that behind the scenes is our deliverer (And our deliverer is not a bumbling Barney Fife but a Chuck Norris-like Divine martial arts expert.) Praise the Lord!

If we believe this then we will see the goodness of God in the land of the living. Notice that we must believe to see, not see to believe. And the goodness of God is the guaranteed result. But what is the land of the living? It could be applied to this world in which we live now. In other words, those who walk in the faith of the goodness of God will in time see that goodness in this present life. I believe that. I just do not presume to tell God how that goodness should appear. But also, the land of the living applies to heaven- the home of those who are eternally alive. If we do not believe that God’s greatest goodness awaits us in heaven, we will never make it through the fearful circumstances of this life. If we believe we will see, and that faith that comes from a focus on God will make our fears disappear.

II. Patience
David readily admits in the passage that although he was living by faith, he was in a waiting mode as he was eagerly anticipating the goodness of God. When he wrote this the implication is that he had not seen the goodness of God yet. He says in verse 14 “Wait on the Lord…wait, I say, on the LORD.” James 1:3 says “…that the trying of your faith worketh patience.” God allows us to be put through trials of faith so that He can produce patience. There is no way to learn patience but to wait.
Do you remember those tests in school- Math with all the equations, English with all of the rules, and History will all of the dates? Just as with the school days in the school of the Christian life we must learn the material and pass the test to go on to new ground. This is the pattern for the course of our lives. In the process we are learning to wait on God’s goodness which is the perfecting virtue of Christ-likeness.

Faith and patience are inextricably linked. Look at Hebrews 11:1 which gives the definition of faith. It says that faith is “…the substance of things hoped for” (emphasis added). So there is an essential element of anticipation in true faith. It involves waiting for some future fulfillment of what you believe. To produce faith and patience then God will cause us to face some challenge that includes no visible sign of deliverance. The consummation of this testing experience is when we learn to accept the challenge with contentment believing that God’s deliverance and goodness will come in this life or in heaven.

This patience is not a passive submission but an active advancement in the face of the trial. It is not standing against the wind, but walking against the wind. That is one of the reasons that I am producing this sermon. It would be easy for me to sit at home and do nothing. But even in sickness there is always some productive activity for the kingdom that can be accomplished.

Listen to these two verses in Hebrews and notice the active mood in which they are written. Hebrews 6:12 says, “be… followers of them who by faith and patience inherit the promises” (emphasis added). Hebrews 10:36, “For you have need of patience,
that, after you have done the will of God you may receive the promise” (emphasis added). It is the false believer that falls away in the face of trial. It is the immature believer who resorts to unproductive worry and complaints. It is the ones who go forward in the face of trial to serve the Lord who find that their faith is real, vital, and growing. Patience is having its perfect work.

III. Courage
David says in verse 14 that if we wait on the Lord and have good courage, God will strengthen our hearts. So the natural result of faith and patience is a divinely ordained strengthening of our hearts- an ever growing courage.

Leonard Sweet gives this illustration: One tribe of Native Americans had a unique courage-building exercise for training their young braves. On the night of a boy’s thirteenth birthday, he was placed in a dense forest to spend the entire night alone. Until then he had never been away from the security of his family and tribe. But on this night he was blindfolded and taken miles away. When he took off the blindfold, he was in the middle of thick woods- by himself- all night long. Every time a twig snapped, he probably visualized a wild animal ready to pounce. Every time an animal howled, he imagined a wolf leaping out of the darkness. Every time the wind blew, he wondered what more sinister sound it masked. No doubt this could be a terrifying night for many.

After what seemed like an eternity, the first rays of sunlight entered into the exterior of the forest. Looking around, the boy saw flowers, trees, and the outline of a path. Then, to his utter astonishment, he beheld a figure of a man standing just a few feet away, armed with a bow and arrow. It was the boy’s father. He had been there all night long. (Citation from Soul Salsa: Zondervan 2000, pp. 23, 24.)

As David focused on the Lord his fears diminished and he was given a confidence in the powerful presence of God on his behalf. He was able to believe that after the dark night he would see the light of God’s protection, provision, and blessing. That is the essence of Christian courage.

Conclusion:
Faith plus patience equals courage. This sick pastor has been working with God to produce all three. Please pray for me as I continue this journey. I am praying for you as well.

In Everything Give Thanks

This has been a very difficult week for us on several levels. I had a day this week when I was very overwhelmed at everything going on and just felt like I was going to snap. Tim was having a terrible day and Mark was a very sick little boy. I had been up much of the night checking on both of them. I was very tired - I actually had a mini pity party and then had a melt down on the phone with my Mom. I was coming unglued and just needed something to help me pull myself together.

That afternoon, I received an e-mail with a devotional in it. The devotional talked about how Daniel prayed with thanksgiving as he entered the lion's den. It spoke of Jonah's prayer in the belly of the whale right before he was thrown up onto dry land. His prayer was full of thanksgiving. Philippians 4:6 tells us to pray with thanksgiving when we are anxious. The result of praying with thanksgiving is PEACE. Daniel had peace and survived the lion's den, Jonah received peace and went on to preach to the city of Ninevah....Philippians 4 tells us that after we pray with thanksgiving "the peace of God which passeth all understanding shall keep your hearts and minds through Christ Jesus."

So, after being reminded of these truths, I began to thank for God all He has done for us so far in this journey. I thanked Him for family and friends who have been there to support us and encourage us. I thanked Him that I have a family to care for. I thanked Him for my husband and how strong he has been through all of this. I also thanked Him for Who He is and for His faithfulness to us. It was only as I began to praise the Lord that I began to sense a calmness return to my spirit and my mind became restful. I didn't feel on the edge of the cliff anymore and I was able to go on and handle the rest of the trials of the day. Thanksgiving truly is the key to peace.

Later on, Mark threw up all over me, himself and our living room and I handled it with grace and dignity! Thank you, Lord, for your peace! :)
-Stacie

"Thou wilt keep him in perfect peace whose mind is stay on Thee..." Isaiah 26:3

Graduation Day

Congratulations!!!! Tim graduated from the stem cell transplant program today! He does not have to go back and forth to the hospital every day any more! He will have monthly visits with the transplant doctor and continue to be monitored by his regular oncologist. We hope to find out how well the stem cell transplant worked in about a month.

His white counts were much lower today, but that is expected, since he is no longer receiving a medication that helps boost the white blood cells. He is producing them on his own, so they are lower (about 2600 today), but over time they should continue to go up. He has had a couple of pretty rough days the last two days, so they gave him more fluids today to help rehydrate him. He is finding that little tasks rob him of any energy that he may have built up. It will just take time and patience to regain strength. We appreciate your prayers as he continues to recover. We are grateful for and overwhelmed by all of the cards, e-mails and phone calls we have received. We can't thank you enough and "...thank my God upon every remembrance of you." (Philippians 1:3)

A note about those who have cared for Tim over the last few weeks- it's hard to express how much we appreciate all of his nurses and caregivers at the Yale Smilow Cancer Hospital. Everyone was very professional, but also very kind and loving. They made sure that he was comfortable and well cared for every step of the way. Thank you to Dr. Cooper, Erin, Mary Ellen, Colleen, Lee, Wade, Barbara, and all the 7th floor staff of Dr. Cooper's office!

One other prayer request...Mark is now running a fever. He must have the virus that McKayla had last week. I will keep an eye on him and he will have to stay away from Tim until the fever is gone. McKayla's fever lasted 2 and 1/2 days, so I am anticipating the same from Mark. We go from one crisis to another around here... :)

Hair Today - Gone Tomorrow!

Well, the day after our post about no hair loss, Tim's hair began coming out. It was a little late, but 2 weeks to the day of his last dose of chemo, it happened. So this afternoon, Stacie took the clippers to his head and we had a mini "shave your head" party. Mark, our 5 year old, did not want to "be bald" as he said, so he opted out of it; but Matthew and Michael were brave and willing participants. Below are a few pictures from the event. Aren't they handsome!

I can't pass up the opportunity to share this one: Tonight when I was putting the kids to bed, I told Michael how proud I was of him for shaving his head for his dad. I told him that it was a very nice thing to do to show his dad how much he loved him and was concerened for him. Michael said he was glad to do it because now he doesn't have to comb his hair for a while!

Now, Michael and Mark share a room, so I looked at Mark and told him that it was okay that he didn't participate and that there were other ways he could show his dad that he loved him. However, I was curious as to why he didn't want to join in with the boys and shave his head, too. So, I asked him why he didn't participate. He looked at me with a very sad and somber expression and said, "Mom, I didn't want to go on the shiny side." Too funny, Mark!

Counts are on the way up

Tim's white blood counts have gone up - all the way to 4,000! His platelets are also being produced on their own, so he will not need any more transfusions. He is experiencing bone pain, but that pain is an indicator that he is producing bone marrow, so the pain is a good thing. His taste is coming back, but things still don't taste exactly as they should. That will improve over time. His nausea comes and goes, but it is decreasing in intensity. His energy level is still very low, and it will stay that way for a while.

The doctor and nurses are amazed at how well he has done. While it has been hard, God has been faithful and sustained Tim through the worst part of the treatment. Of course, we know that it is because we have 100's of people praying for him! We are so grateful that he did not have to be admitted to the hospital and that he was able to go through this at home where he could be comfortable. Now, he is in recovery mode. He will need to be careful because as he begins to feel better, he will have the tendency to over do. Tim is not one to sit still, but he will have to continue to rest and let his body completely heal from this ordeal. That will take several weeks. We have one more hospital visit on Wednesday and then if his levels look good, he will graduate from the transplant program. Then, he will have monthly visits for several months.

Many people have asked if Tim has lost his hair...Well, no he hasn't. There are a few friends that are waiting to have a shave your head party in support of Tim, but that hasn't been necessary. It has thinned a bit, but it has not come out like all the nurses said that it would. It may still in the next week or so, but we are amazed that so far, he still has most of his hair! :)

Stacie's parents are on their way back to Georgia. We can't say how much we appreciate all that they did for us while they were here. Dad repaired the washing machine, put in a new ceiling fan and light fixtures and even started organizing Tim's tool table for him. He can't sit still -hmm...like father, like son-in-law??? :) He also went to the hospital with Tim on several occasions to allow Stacie to stay home a few days during Tim's treatment. Mom did so much laundry- we lost count of how many loads she did. She had forgotten that when you have kids in your home, the laundry breeds itself. You can have it all done one day, and the next day, the basket is full and it needs to be done again. She also pulled Stacie away a few times to go shopping - very therapeutic! Anyway, we know that they are just plain worn out! They are retired and used to a quiet home. Being back in the business of family life can be stressful on grandparents, but they handled it with class...even daring to take the kids to Chuck E. Cheese' s one day. Now that's brave!!! We are sure they will take several days to recover from being here! We are so grateful to them - just wish we lived closer to each other.

Day +10

Yesterday, Tim's platelets were up so he didn't need to have a transfusion. His white blood count had started to inch up as well...all the way from 100 to 200! Today (Saturday), his platelets were really low - low enough that he should have had another transfusion, but because his white blood count had come up even more (up to 700), the doctor wanted to see how well his body would produce platelets on its own. So he will be tested again tomorrow and if they are still low, he will receive another transfusion. The doctor said that all of his levels will go up and down for a few days until they begin to steadily climb sometime in the coming week.

Tim is definitely feeling better and coming out of the lowest part of the treatment. He still tires easily, but has had two pretty good days. He is beginning to get his taste back. Not everything tastes like it should, but things are improving, so he is eating better. He still has to be careful about being in crowds for a while. His immune system has been destroyed with this treatment, so he needs to be very careful until it has completely rebuilt itself.

McKayla ran a fever again yesterday and her appetite has not been good, but today, her fever broke and she has been back to her perky self. She still doesn't have her appetite back, but she is doing better. The kids have had a few melt downs this week...just having a hard time dealing with things, but they are doing well considering all that is going on. We appreciate your prayers for them. So far, no one else has come down with a fever.

Day +8

Tim's platelet count was low enough again today that he had to receive another transfusion and was not feeling well this afternoon. Tonight, he seems to be a little better - enjoying the last game of the NBA finals. He hasn't been sleeping well the last few nights, so we are praying for a good night's sleep tonight. Two more days until Day +10 ...that is the day Tim's levels should begin to start inching up and he should begin to turn the corner.

Please pray for our daughter, McKayla. She woke up this morning running a fever and complaining of a headache and stomach ache. As the day went on, her fever kept going higher, so I took her to the pediatrician. She seems to have a virus - there is no ear infection or strep. Her fever finally came down tonight before I put her to bed, but she is still not feeling well. We have already been keeping the kids at a distance from Tim, but of course, we are concerned that he doesn't get this virus. It would be very serious if he started running a fever. We are also concerned about the rest of the kids (or me) coming down with it. Please pray that this is just a quick 24-hour bug and will not go through the whole family!

Details

This post is for those of you who like details. Each morning when we arrive at the hospital, Tim receives IV fluids to keep from dehydration, antibiotics to keep from infection and has his blood drawn and sent to the lab. At the lab, they check several things in his blood: his red blood cell count, his white blood cell count, his platelet count and more. Because of the chemo, his white blood cells are expected to fall very low. Typically, your white blood count is between 5,000 and 10,000. Today, his white blood count was 100 -yes, 100. This is why he is at such a risk for infection and must be very careful where he goes and who he is around. His platelets which help with clotting were at 19 today - they should be around 150. So he had to receive a transfusion of platelets this morning. His blood pressure was also very low today, so they monitored that closely. As he received extra IV fluids, his blood pressure came up and stabilized.

Needless to say, Tim is very weak as a result of what is happening in his blood and gets tired just sitting up talking for any length of time. He is at a very difficult point in the treatment because of how awful he feels. He is not in any pain, but he is nauseated, and experiencing several other side effects, especially severe fatigue. The doctor says that he should start turning the corner by day 10 which is Saturday. This is when the side effects of the chemo will begin to subside a bit and the stem cells that he received last week will begin to engraft. He is very much looking forward to Saturday!

My mom and dad have been a huge help since they have been here. Daddy and I have been taking turns driving Tim to the hospital and sitting with him each day. I am blessed that my dad and my husband respect each other so much and have such a good relationship, so my dad doesn't mind going. Mom is helping with laundry, food, and keeping the kids entertained on the days that I am at the hospital. I am so grateful that they are here. I couldn't do this without them. And we couldn't do this without your prayers, so we thank you for each prayer that is lifted up for us.

Missing Church

Today has been a difficult day - for the first time since he was diagnosed with cancer, Tim missed church. God has given him divine stamina and he has been able to continue to study and preach through all of his treatments. It has been amazing to see how much strength he has and it has been a testimony to many people. There were days when I didn't think he should be preaching - I knew he didn't feel well - but he would preach anyway and those days were some of his best sermons! Two Sundays ago, he was at church, but unable to preach and now today, he was not there at all.

It was very strange to get up and go the hospital instead of go to church. Needless to say, Tim greatly missed preaching and worshipping with our church family this morning. There were several other people in the treatment room with us at the hospital today who were hooked up to IV's, so I told Tim that he had a captive audience and that he could just start preaching to them ...they would have to listen! He probably would have if he hadn't been so weak! :)

It has been a privilege to be able to witness to several of those who are on the treatment team. When one of his nurses found out that we are born again Christians, she said, "Oh, that explains it! Now I understand why you both are at such peace through all of this." We were able to share how the Lord is our Rock and our Strength and it is only through His work in our hearts that His peace can be seen in difficult times. We pray that we will continue to be a witness for Him.

Tim is weak and cannot taste his food. He says that he tastes the texture of food, but not the actual taste and that makes it hard to eat. He has been forcing himself to eat small portions, but it's not easy. He was able to sit up for a short time this evening, but he gets tired very quickly and has to go back to bed. His blood counts continue to drop, which means he is feeling weaker and weaker, but that is to be expected. The treatment is going exactly as the doctor had said it would, so even though it is hard, it is encouraging to know he is responding the way he should. Thank you for your prayers on Tim's behalf.

Friday, June 11

There is not much news tonight: Tim received an IV drip today to make sure that he stays hydrated. He will receive this IV everyday for the next 2 weeks. He is experiencing severe fatigue and loss of taste, which makes it hard for him to eat.

There is more of the same on the schedule for tomorrow - a visit to the hospital that lasts 4-6 hours to receive fluids and be monitored...then home to rest and sleep. Stacie's dad will go with Tim tomorrow so that Stacie can stay with the kids and get caught up on a few things at home. Aunt Fran (a brave lady in our church) came and took all four of the kids out today for an afternoon of miniture golf and Dairy Queen and gave Grandma and Grandpa Ashmore some quiet time. They had a blast and love Aunt Fran!

We have officially hired Matt Fitch to be our assistant pastor, so Matt and Julie are here this weekend to search for a place to live. They will be moving to Connecticut the first of August to begin serving at CBC. We are so thrilled that God led us together and are looking forward to having them as a part of our CBC family. Matt will be preaching on Sunday in Tim's place.

Home Sweet Home

Today, the stem cell reinfusion was completed. The stem cells that were collected from Tim two weeks ago were placed back into his body. He welcomed them home as they were entering his arm this morning! They are now on their way to planting themselves back into his body and rebuilding his bone marrow that was killed by the chemo. Home sweet home, little cells. :) It will take about 10 days for the bone marrow to begin to rebuild; so between now and then, he is at very high risk for infection, fever, etc., and we have to watch him closely.


He is beginning to feel the effects of the chemo that he received over the last two days...mainly fatigue and a bit of a decreased appetite. We have the day off from any doctor's appointments tomorrow so he will be resting much of the day, and then Friday he will go back to the hospital to be checked, and if necessary receive any fluids or medications that he might need. That will be our routine for the next two weeks. Some rough days are ahead. Thank you for praying.

Day -2 and Counting

Today was a long day for us... we arrived at the hospital around 7:45 in the morning and finally got back home around 4:00 this afternoon. There was a lot that had to be done before Tim could actually begin the chemotherapy. He had a PICC line inserted into his arm. This is just a tiny catheter inserted into his arm which allows the nurses to draw blood and give the medications he needs without poking him with so many needles. He will have to have blood work done for the next 15 days, so he was glad that they gave him this device. However, the procedure took a long time and then we had to wait for the test results after the line was inserted to be sure it was functioning properly before they could use it. (This may be more information than some would like to know, but others of you are into the details, so...we will include some of them.) Then, there was concern because his white blood counts were very low; the treatment team had to locate the doctor overseeing the transplant to make sure that it was okay to begin the chemo. We waited patiently as they determined whether or not he should start the chemo. Finally, the word came that he should go ahead.

We were both pretty anxious as the time came near for the actual chemo drug to start dripping into his body. We have been given so much information on the side effects and what to expect over the next several weeks, it is a bit unnerving. We have really had to just rest in the Lord these last few days and trust that He will take care of Tim. We have been blessed to recently hear sermons on trusting in the Lord and resting in the Lord. Last Sunday, Pastor Aspray from Rhode Island preached on Proverbs 3:5 & 6. It was a great encouragement to be reminded that even when we don't understand what is happening in our lives, we are to be prepared to go wherever He leads us and not rely on our own faulty wisdom. We can trust that He knows what is best for us and in the end, we will be able to look back and see that His way was the perfect way.

Yesterday, Pastor Jeremy Rowland from Baptist Church Planting Ministry spoke in our Adult Bible Class. He spoke on the passage from Psalm 46:10 that says, "Be still and know that I am God." It was a great reminder to us that God is in control and we are to let go and release our fears into His hands. God is our refuge - our place of retreat where we receive comfort and strength to go on in the middle of trials. We are so grateful that we have a God Who is faithful to us and calls us to run to Him and rest in Him so that we might receive the grace to continue in the path He has for us.

Tim is pretty tired tonight, and experiencing mild side effects of one of the medications he received today, but he is in good spirits. Thank you for the e-mails and cards many of you have sent in the last week. We truly appreciate each prayer that is offered up on our behalf.

Good News!

This morning, we met with the doctor who is overseeing Tim's transplant and he informed us that the stem cells that were collected last week are okay - there is no infection and no need to go through another collection process. Praise the Lord for that! So, we are all set to proceed with the plan. Monday morning, June 7, Tim will receive his first round of high dose chemo and then another round on Tuesday. He should begin to feel the side effects of the chemo by the end of next week. This Sunday, June 6, is his last day to preach at CBC for a while. It should be a pretty emotional service for all of us!

The kids are having a blast in Pennsylvania! They have been very active this week and full of stories about what they have been doing. Mom and Dad have enjoyed our quiet time, but we are ready to have some noise back in the house. Stacie will be driving to meet Sheryl at a half way point tomorrow to pick up the kids. I'm sure Grandma Zac and Aunt Sheryl will return home and sleep for the next week!!!

IT'S TOO QUIET!

It's too quiet around here! All of the kids - yes, I said ALL of the kids went to Pennsylvania to stay with Grandma Zac, Uncle Mike and Aunt Sheryl for several days. The kids were so excited to go. We think that Sheryl lost her mind when she asked if she could take them home with her and keep them for a week. Oh, to be a fly on the wall in her house right now!

Mom and Dad don't know what to do. No one is calling our name, no one needs to be fed, no fights to break up, no sports activities to drive to, no baths to give...IT'S TOO QUIET!!! We miss our kiddos, but we are going to try to enjoy this week together before Tim's treatment really picks up. They will be back later this week when Grandma and Grandpa Ashmore (Stacie's parents) join us in Connecticut for a few weeks. They are coming to help as Tim's chemo treatments get underway.

This week's schedule is somewhat calm. We are waiting to find out if the stem cells that were collected last week are okay. Because Tim developed an infection during the collection process (not because of the collection, but because of his weakened immune system), there is a possibility that the stem cells will be rejected and he will have to go through another round of collection. Not fun! The stem cells are being checked for infection, and we should know some time this week whether or not they are okay to use. We are praying that the stem cells are good so that the therapy will be able to begin on schedule.

K-5 Graduation

On Thursday night, May 27th, our youngest son, Mark, graduated from Kindergarden at Heritage Baptist Academy. Grandma Zac and Aunt Sheryl were able to be there with us. Mark was very nervous, but was too cute in that funny hat and gown. We are so proud of him! McKayla was also given several academic honors during the awards part of the service. Way to go, McKayla and Mark!

Stem Cell Collection

On Tuesday, May 25, Tim began the stem cell collection process. He had a needle in both arms that was hooked to a machine to collect his stem cells. One side was taking the blood out, circulating it through a machine that separated it into different components, ultimately seeking to collect as many stem cells as possible. The goal was to collect 10 MILLION stem cells! This procedure was difficult for Tim because he had to sit still for over 4 hours! He could not move one arm at all, and he had very limited use of his other arm. We were told this procedure could take anywhere from 2-5 days. This was pure torture for someone who is very active and does not like to be pinned down! After only TWO days, we had success. They did not get 10 million cells, but they came close enough that he didn't have to go back for a 3rd or 4th day. HALLELUJAH!!!

There were some uncomfortable side effects during this procedure - it has been a rough week. Tim also developed an infection during the collection that has required another course of anitbiotics. One of the results of having so many rounds of chemo is that the body's immune system is weakened. He has not felt well at all this week.

Tim has not had the energy to put into preparing a sermon that he needs and is not sure how he is going to feel on Sunday. We have been praying about having someone take the morning service for him. God had already providentially prepared for this - Pastor Aspray had planned to be in our service this week and is ready and willing to preach. It is so comforting to know that God is ahead of us and taking care of us each step of the way.

Stem Cell Therapy

GREAT NEWS!!!

At the end of April, Tim was told that he was ready for the stem cell therapy. The oncologist was very pleased with how well he responded to the new chemo drugs. His myeloma percentages went from 60% down to 5%! Praise the Lord! That is a huge drop!! Our goal was to get below 20% in order to begin the stem cell procedure.

On Friday, May 21, he began receiving injections of a drug that made his body produce more stem cells. He received these injections on Friday, Saturday, Sunday and Monday. On Monday, he also received another drug that would release the stem cells from the bone marrow and into the blood stream so that they could collect the stem cells through a blood draw.

On June 7 and 8, Tim will receive high doses of chemotherapy that will kill his bone marrow. He will have to be closely monitored because this will put him at risk of infection, fever, etc. (If this occurs, he will have to be hospitalized.) On June 9th, they will infuse his treated stem cells back into his body with the goal that they will return to the bone and grow new marrow - this should force the cancer into remission. The bone marrow only takes about 10 day to begin to grow, but the recovery time is anywhere from 2-6 months. June 6th is Tim's last day to preach for a few months. Not preaching may be harder on Tim than the side effects of this treatment! He has a passion for preaching God's Word and a deep love for the folks of CBC. It will be very hard for him to be away.

God has provided a pastor to fill in for Tim during the time he is away. Pastor John Aspray from Rhode Island will come down each week and conduct the services for CBC and ensure that the church continues to run smoothly. We are grateful to Pastor Aspray and his willingness to help us during these next few months.

Prayer Requests:

• that the cancer will go into a deep, long remission


• for Tim as he goes through this treatment and has to endure some difficult side effects


• for Stacie as she takes care of Tim and tries to keep things as "normal" as possible for the children


• for our kids- Matthew (17), Michael (13), McKayla (6), and Mark (5) - as they watch their daddy go through this difficult time


• our extended family as they come to help with the kids and other responsibilities
  
• for our church family to continue to grow and walk with the Lord while their pastor is away

Jeremiah 17:7 "Blessed is the man that trusteth in the Lord, and whose hope the Lord is."

Benefits

"Blessed be the Lord, who daily loadeth us with benefits, even the God of our salvation." Psalm 68:19

A pastor friend of ours came to our church to preach for Tim on a few Sunday nights in March, 2010. He began to come when Tim started his new chemo drug and just needed some help getting through Sundays. The new chemo caused extreme fatigue. This friend preached a message that has stuck with me and has been a tremendous help to me.

Psalm 68:19 tells us that the Lord daily loads us with benefits. Now in my mind, a benefit is something that is GOOD - something that I enjoy. However, the true meaning of the word benefit in this verse is not necessarily something that I will enjoy; it is something that will benefit me...that may be good or it may be hard or painful. Getting a cavity filled may be painful, but it is beneficial to me. Cleaning a wound may be painful for me, but it is beneficial to my health. Going through trials in our lives may be painful, but the outcome is beneficial for me. I need to look at the hard times as beneficial to me. They are meant to strengthen me, increase my faith, and take me to a higher place in my walk with the Lord.

The verse also says that He LOADS us with benefits. Sometimes these benefits are pleasurable and sometimes these "benefits" are hard and heavy to bear. But in the end, they all are benefits and they come frequently throughout my day. These truths have spoken to me and help me to look at the difficult days in a different light.

Dear Lord, my heart's desire is to please You, so I thank you for daily loading me with benefits! Whether humanly they are perceived as "good" or "bad," help me to receive these benefits with thanksgiving, knowing they are all for my good. Please work these truths into my heart.

40% to 60%

One of the tests that the oncologist did to determine that Tim did in fact have multiple myeloma was a bone marrow extraction. This is because multiple myeloma lives in the bone marrow, so it is one of the more reliable tests to determine what is going on. Bone marrow extraction is quite painful, so they don't like to do it very often. The results of the first bone marrow test showed 40% myeloma cells in Tim's body. From then on, he would have blood tests to determine whether the chemo was doing it's job.

For a while the chemo seemed to be working, but then the blood tests became inconclusive and the oncologists were having a difficult time determining what was happening. His cancer was not behaving like the text books say it should - does it ever? Tim was still having several symptoms that he shouldn't have been having; and during another MRI to look at the main tumor, they found more lesions on his spinal column. The oncologist said Tim's was a tougher case than usual.
So in February, after being on the chemo for about 4 months, the doctors decided they should extract more bone marrow. This test showed negative results - the myeloma had increased from 40% to 60%.

This news was very discouraging for us - Tim was determined that he would be able to start the stem cell therapy around February or March. We had a hard time processing this "bad" news. Of course this wasn't bad news in the Lord's eyes - this was part of the plan. But humanly speaking, this was not good. We were trusting the Lord to use the medications to get Tim ready for stem cell therapy, and instead he was facing a harsher chemo and more difficult side effects.

We had to continue to rest in the goodness of the Lord and remember that everything that was happening was part of His plan to get glory from our lives and make us more like Him. It's not about us, it's about Him and His will. The Lord gave us several confirmations during that time that He cares for us and is with us through the storm.

We received so many cards, letters and e-mails and phone calls during this time... it was overwhelming. We also received several financial gifts to help with expenses. Our church family brought meals, gave gift cards to the grocery store and restaurants and kept the kids when that was needed. All of these gestures helped to remind us that we are not alone. We continue to receive cards and e-mails, almost every day. It means so much to know that folks are concerned and are praying for Tim.

Psalm 62:5 "My soul wait thou only upon God; for my expectation is from Him."

A Horse of a Different Color

During the rounds of radiation, the oncologist placed Tim on a series of medications. One was a chemotherapy drug that he just took at home each day. To his great pleasure, Tim did not loose his hair on this drug!! (We Zacharias' have a thing about hair and he was very concerned that he would loose his! ;) He was also placed on a steroid drug to go along with the chemo. The steroid is supposed to help with nausea, but it's main purpose is to cause your body to grow new bone. Multiple myeloma lives in the bone marrow, but attacks the bones from the inside out. The tumor that attacked Tim's bone has basically eaten it from the inside out. His spinal column is now weakened and he has to be very careful not to lift anything over 15-20 pounds.

Anyway, the steroid was helping to grow new bone - it will never be at the strength that it was before the cancer, but it could help. Well, the steroid did funny things to Tim. Besides having cold sweats and a racing heart, he became the "horse of a different color" from the Wizard of Oz! After receiving the Decadron treatment, he would turn white as a sheet for several hours; then his skin would look yellow, like he had jaundice. Several hours later, he would look wind-burned...his skin would have a reddish tint to it. Finally, the color changing would stop and he would regain his normal skin color. This whole color-changing process would take a little over 24 hours.

It was kind of funny to watch the process and we got a laugh out of it. There were a few occasions when he would ask the doctors to re-schedule the shot or allow him to get it eary - he was trying to work around having to visit people. He didn't want to alarm people with the way he looked - especially when he was yellow!

20 days of radiation (Sept-Oct 2009)

For as long as I have known Tim, I have never seen him get sick to his stomach. During the days when he was receiving radiation, he was sick. The beam that was working to shrink the tumor was also grazing his stomach and that is what caused the nausea. He had little to no appetite as well, and ended up losing 22 pounds during the course of treatment. It also made him very tired. He was only able to work 1/2 of a day and then would have to lay down for a long afternoon nap.

During those difficult days, you have to find humor some where or you may loose your mind - we kept talking about the fact that now Tim knew how I felt during my pregnancies. I was so very sick all the way through to delivery. While it's not something I wish on anyone, Tim has a whole new appreciation for how awful I felt. It was a little running joke that we had between each other.

The results of the radiation were good results. After a couple of months, the pain began to subside and Tim was gradually able to manage the pain better and decrease his medication. He still required pain meds to sleep and to preach each Sunday (standing for long periods made the pain worse). Our church people talked about how his sermons kept getting better and better -even on the medication. God gave grace and allowed him to preach passionately every Sunday during the radiation treatments. Mondays were very hard because of all the energy he had exherted the day before. I did my best to keep him laying low --but I didn't have much success! Tim is a go-getter and was determined not to let this get him down!

~Stacie

Happy 10th Anniversary CBC!

The next few weeks were full of visits to different doctor's offices. Our dear friends, Dr. Jim and his wife, Kendra, put us in contact with a radiation oncologist who took on Tim's case with great fervor and worked Tim into the schedule of the radiation department. This doctor then got us an appointment with the medical oncologist, who began the chemo and other treatments to begin attacking the cancer. The goal of the treatments was to force the cancer to it's lowest possible levels (remission). At the time of diagnosis, Tim's multiple myeloma levels were at 40%. Our goal was to get to below 20% so that he could have the stem cell replacement therapy. Tim had to have 20 treatments of radiation to attack the larger tumor. He was also placed on several medications.

On September 19, 2009, we had two amazing services for the 10th anniversary celebration of our church, Community Baptist Church of Branford, Connecticut. We planted CBC in September of 1999 (http://www.cbcbranford.org/) and it was such a glorious day to look back on all that God had done for us over the last 10 years. Many friends and people from the community joined us - we were packed into our little building! Ray and Ann Gibbs, two amazing people who happened to have beautiful voices, joined us to sing and our friends Mark and Bethany Crawford came as well. Mark played the piano and accompanied the Gibbs as they sang powerful songs of testimony and praise.

We had a celebration banquet that evening at a local restaurant. Several pastors from around Connecticut joined us in support, and most of our church family was there as well. It was a powerful service as the pastors came forward and laid hands on Tim, praying for healing, but most of all for God's will to be done in Tim's life. We also showed a powerpoint presentation that highlighted many of the events over the last 10 years, and focused on the people that have been touched through the ministry of CBC.

It was very significant to us that as we entered this dark valley, the Lord caused us to take a day and look back on how He had been with us during the ups and downs of the last 10 years and we could be assured that He would be there in the difficult days ahead. Although Tim was in a tremendous amount of pain that day, he was rejoicing in all that God has done for us. It was a day that we will never forget.




Several area pastors, their wives and children that attended




Ray and Ann Gibbs - and - Mark and Bethany Crawford



Mark relaxing after a long day!

Working His Good Will

In February of 2009, Tim began having some back pain. We didn't think much of it as it would come and go. Then in April, we took a long road trip to Georgia to see Stacie's parents, and the entire trip was very uncomfortable for Tim. He vowed we would never drive that far again! He had been seeing a chiropractor, and had benefited from the treatments in the past; however, this time the pain just kept getting more and more intense throughout the summer.

Toward the end of August, his pain became so intense that at times, he could not walk. His back would "lock up" on him and he would lie on the floor in excruciating pain for two or three hours at a time. After this happened several times, we decided that he should have an MRI to determine if he had some kind of problem with a disc in his lower back.

Tim had been seeing a Christian chiropractor (who is also a member of our church)- Dr. Jim loves the Lord and loves his pastor. He was very concerned for Tim, and he and his wife helped us get the MRI ordered and completed quickly. They even worked on getting the results of the MRI ASAP!

Later that evening, Dr. Jim called us with the news. There was a mass of abnormal tissue on Tim's lower spinal column that had completely engulfed one of his vertebrae and was causing the intense pain. There was also another smaller tumor in the middle of his back...and the diagnosis was not good. It looked to be one of three kinds of cancers and more tests would be needed to determine exactly which cancer it was. We asked if there was any possibility that it could just be a slipped or herniated disc...the answer came back, "No, there are not any other options on this report." Dr. Jim was so good with us - very gentle and very concerned. We sensed that he was hurting with us. It was a blessing that God allowed us to hear this devastating news from a fellow believer who could speak words of comfort from the Scripture and pray with us as we tried to wrap our head around what we were told.

We both felt numb when we got off the phone. This wasn't even on our list of possibilities when considering where Tim's back pain was coming from. Of course, we cried and prayed and cried some more. Obviously, this was devastating news and we weren't quite sure how to process it. The news came late on Friday night, so we had to wait until the beginning of the next week to start making appointments for the needed tests. We had to tell our children, our families, and also our church family. Those conversations were very difficult.

The next week, Tim had several tests and it was confirmed that, at 43 years of age, he had multiple myeloma. This is a cancer of the blood plasma that attacks your bones. He would need to begin 20 days of radiation to try to shrink the larger tumor on his spine, and hopefully ease some of his pain; and he would begin chemotherapy to attack the smaller tumor and the cancer in his blood. All of this came as we were planning and preparing for our church's 10th anniversary celebration. The verse that kept coming to us during these days was Philippians 2:13 which says, "For it is God which worketh in you, both to will and to do of His good pleasure." God's will is best for us, even when we cannot see what His plan is. We had to rest in the truth of this verse and know that He was going to use this in our lives for His glory and our good.